Bright Spots

I've had two good days in a row.  I could speculate as to why they were good:  I got good sleep, my sister came over, my kids needed me to be okay, but the truth is that there is no rhyme or reason in grief.  Sometimes  I feel Tabitha's absence deeply, painfully and other times I can miss her and be okay with the missing.  Either way, life continues go forward.  I sleep, I wake up, I feed children, change diapers, go grocery shopping, drive kids to school, pick kids up from school, pick up the living room (or leave it a mess) kiss owies, fold laundry, snuggle babies, and then do it all again.  I try to take advantage of the good days, knowing that the bad days are for mere survival.

Today a bright spot to my day was watching Colin perform in his school's poetry recitation contest.  This is an annual contest, but until this year Colin was too nervous to even participate.  I was quite surprised to learn that he had memorized a poem (with a supportive teacher and time in class) and when he performed it for me complete with actions and voices I was thrilled for him.  He chose The Adventures of Isabelle by Ogden Nash.  Before now, he has been scared to death to get up in front of people.  He was chosen as one of the two from his class to compete in front of judges and the whole elementary school.  He was confident, entertaining and was practically giddy when he was awarded first place in his division.

He has already started memorizing his selection for next year.  He has decided he wants to do The Walrus and the Carpenter by Lewis Carroll.  It's a long poem, but he already has a good chunk of it memorized and he's pretty good at doing things he sets his mind to.